I’m going to SPA. You know what, I’ve got 2 blow instruments with me the flute and the harmonica I love harmony. Yes, I’m composing I guess. I started to get obsessed with blow instruments because of my smoke, I need to stop smoke and how I don’t have my mic yet why, why I don’t have my mic because if so I could get expelled of my building because noise and neighbors I need a recording studio for my rehearsal and actually I’m looking even for a more useful music box to connect both mic and guitar but mid to small size to carry with me like those tape players from the past.
But actually, last Valentine I woke up with a record playing loads of good old school sax and also I have live music pretty close to me on the bar of the corner that I even prepared with them bits they have stimulated myself to go for it, despite my depression.
I’m fighting with depression for long time, also I don’t get inspired for nothing. I’m having a lack of inspiration. It seems time has passed everything got faded and I feel like a fish out of water and yet that the past doesn’t make sense as I’m not a teen anymore so even my memories are fading and I’m stuck on a boring routine. It is like a misunderstood, it is a time-lapse.
I’ve tried old records, the good old records but everybody gets old sometimes so I’m trying to run fast and still make the gig along. And I like definitely, quality. Lately I thankfully have been seen a new scene coming along from dub, ambient, latin, french-touch, shoegaze and even goth people trying to make something of awaking time. I’ve found some new musicians and definitely they have saved my life this year in 2022 and that is mainly and only what have fulfilled me for this time.
The thing is, how I need a shake shake shekoleton I’m planning to make a move and with that I loose my stability, it is not confirmed yet but I think it is worth get off from the comfort zone as I’m too long stuck on the same old culture. But when I think it is very difficult live internationally I wonder, is yet worth than look like an out of date spoiled apple possibly have some fun but I also got recession time twice abroad and it also has caused me some bad memories.
That is why depleted. Recession outside broke my legs too and I got used with long term unemployment together that I will think forever that it was sluggish and late. Well, I started at age of 4 on my art performance and studies that I still cannot understand why so sluggish and to be honest I didn’t find much of professionals help, in fact my amateurs friends where really a great hand but who like to be an amateur forever. Stop with the amateur.
Work as a PRO.
So, I have diversified my work force to make it happen.
If not as a PRO I will have my way on lifestyle then.